You are the result of an incestuous relationship. I can prove it with simple math. Two people were needed to create you. Four people to create those two. Eight to create those four, and so on. Put 2 to the power of the generation that you wish to look back on. That’s how you determine the number of people required for your creation. If we look back 15 generations, all we need to do is solve 2 to the power of 15. We find out that 32,768 people were needed for your creation. Quite the army, wouldn’t you say?

Let’s assume life expectancy was on average 50 years. Looking back 15 generations would lead us to the 12th century. We’re in the middle of the High Middle Ages. Population in Europe is increasing rapidly because of favorable economic conditions. Now let’s look back 40 generations, to the 4th century BC. Solving for 2 to the power of 40 gives us a number over a trillion (1,099,511,627,776 to be precise). That’s much higher than the number of people that have ever lived. How is that possible? Incest, and quite a lot of it.

You might think this explains much of your idiotic behavior, but unfortunately that won’t be a good excuse. Much of the incest in your family tree has been of the harmless kind, e.g. with a very distant cousin from your mother’s side who worked as a clerk in a dingy office and could only afford meat once a week. In fact, if you are currently together with someone from your own race and country, the chances are high that you are in some way related. So next time you’re on the London Tube during rush hour, have a look around and realize that most of the people you see are family.